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“Alright, here’s three elastic bands, just before you get into bed on the wedding night go to the toilet and stick these up, when they go ‘twang’ you tell him it’s just your virginity going”And again all went well.Then the third daughter came to her mother and said “Mom, you know...”The mother interrupted “I know, you’re getting married to Bill, he thinks you’re a virgin and you’re not”.“Bbbut how do you know that.” Stammered the daughter.“I just know,” said the mother, “how many men have you slept with?“Oh!god, I lost count”, said the daughter.“Here stick the whole box of elastic bands up and when they go ‘twang’ and he asks what that was, you just say it’s your virginity going”.So on the wedding night she goes into the bathroom and stuffs the lot up then climbs into bed.Soon things get to the critical point when ‘TWANG’.“What the hell was that?” Shouted the new husband.“Don’t worry, darling, that was just my virginity going.”“Well for Christ sake go and catch it” he screamed, “it’s. Phone: What the hell did you say to Roscoe? He hasn’t been this wound up since Hillary visited. ‘General, I have not spoken a word to him. I asked my wife if she wanted to accept your invitation. It was Sheila you wanted to talk to, wasn’t it? She’s the talent. I just run the company.’ Phone: Run it pretty damn well from what I’ve seen. But, you’re right. She is the person of interest. ‘General, I am going to speak plainly. We are on our honeymoon. Half our time, so far, has been in airports or on planes. We have three days scheduled, on an island, in a luxury time share. You are not going to compete with that.’ Phone: Not awed by my august position are you Sergeant? I am guessing that you won’t go to the island today. I can offer you VIP accommodations and a traditional luau. Your wife can try hula…What’s so damn funny? ‘Sorry General, but my wife studied ballet—Bolshoi and Carnegie Hall. Tourist level hula will not impress her. As to the other, we have arrangements for tonight. I.
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